Jacques and Martine, an ordinary bourgeois couple, invite to dinner a friend whom they have not seen the last ten years. Since then he has become a media star and everything has to go just right at dinner.

Fatima, an Algerian-born woman who now lives in France with her two teenage daughters, with whom she is barely able to communicate.

"Smoking" and "No Smoking" are two segments of the film which are based on closely connected plays. The original plays covered eight separate stories, which have been pared down to three each for these movies. At a certain point in the story of each segment, the five female characters (all played by Sabine Azema) and the four male characters (all played by Pierre Arditi) have their lives skillfully recapped in terms of "what might have happened" if they had made or failed to make certain choices. For example, "No Smoking" focuses chiefly on the relationship between the mild-mannered Miles Coombes and his infinitely more aggressive and ambitious wife, Rowena.

In 1960s France, 16-year-old Hannah Goldman is experiencing a painful adolescence. Her Jewish background and plain appearance make her an object of ridicule, but she has a talent for music and is determined to fulfil her ambition to play in the school jazz band.

In Hamburg, German-Greek chef Zinos unknowingly disturbs the peace in his locals-only restaurant by hiring a more talented chef.

Tanguy is 28 years old and still living with his parents. They think it's time he moves out. He doesn't, so they hatch a plan.

Three half-brothers are reunited at their mother's funeral. After being told of their inheritance they quickly spend the money, only to find out that they will not receive it after all. The men grow closer while deciding how to proceed.

In 35,000 BC, the tribe of the Dirty Hairs is at war against the tribe of the Clean Hairs for eight hundred years, trying to get their shampoo. The chief of the Dirty Hairs sends his daughter Guy disguised to the enemy tribe to get some shampoo for his tribe. When the healer of the Clean Hairs tribe surprisingly kills two cavemen of his tribe, their imbecile chief assigns Pierre with curled hair and Pierre blonde to investigate the murder and find the criminal.

Two musicians witness a mob hit and struggle to find a way out of the city before they are found by the gangsters. Their only opportunity is to join an all-girl band as they leave on a tour. To make their getaway they must first disguise themselves as women, then keep their identities secret and deal with the problems this brings - such as an attractive bandmate and a very determined suitor.

Four high school teachers launch a drinking experiment: upholding a constant low level of intoxication.